One of the saddest things that can happen into the life of a father is finding out that his teenage daughter is pregnant. The truth is that there is no easy way to handle this situation. It is normal for the father to feel angry, clueless or embarrassed about this situation. If you are going through this suffering in your life, do not worry because it is not yet the end of the world. There are a lot of things that can you can do to handle the situation. Below is a list of therapist’s tips that every father must remember when it comes to dealing with teenage pregnancy:
Keep Your Cool
What you are feeling at this moment is not something out of the ordinary. It is completely understandable if you feel betrayed about what happened to your daughter. You may think that her life is already over now that she is about to give birth at a young age. However, there is nothing that you can do to change the past. As such, accept what happened and keep your cool so that you can think clearly about the next steps that you are going to take. As long as you are mad, you can never think right.
Forgive Her First
Do not shut your daughter away just because she made a mistake. Welcome her back into your open arms. This is the moment wherein she needs you the most. As such, the right thing to do is to forgive her for what happened. Remember that in so doing, you are going to take the burden away from her life. At the same time, you are also going to give yourself a chance to move on from this unfortunate event. Failure to forgive her will only increase your stress and anxiety. Robert Enright Ph.D. explains that “Genuine forgiving, seeking forgiveness, and reconciliation are between and among human equals in which all parties have inherent worth and this is seen and acknowledged.”
Talk To Your Teen
Find a way to have a meaningful conversation with your teenage daughter. Take note that avoiding her is never a good idea as it can send a negative message to her. She may become too stressed, which can be a bad thing for an expecting mother. Make sure to think twice before you say something to your teen. “What we say and what we ask gives them an initial suggestion, which can be immensely helpful, especially in times of conflict.” says Miki Kashtan Ph.D. She can be sensitive at this time, which is why you must be careful with whatever you will tell her. Moreover, do not forget the significance of right timing when it comes to opening up to your beloved daughter.
Check Her Health
Now that your teen is already pregnant, she is not the only one who must be your primary concern. Right now, you must also think of your grandchild. For this reason, you must start to look for a medical doctor for regular checkups. Take note that your daughter needs to show up on doctor appointments so that you can avoid encountering problems or issues during pregnancy. The said medical professional can also advise your daughter on the proper things to during the three trimesters.
Cook For Her
Do not stop showing lovely gestures to your daughter now that she is going to become a teenage mother. As much as possible, continue whatever it is that you are doing to make her feel happy and special. You must make an effort to cook healthy meals for her. Avoid bringing her to restaurants and fast food chains because these food establishments usually use unhealthy ingredients for their meals. It is always a great idea to cook for her. It will not only keep her safe but also make her feel that you have forgiven her.
Book A Therapist
Do you think that your child has a difficult time to accept the situation? Does she need professional help to make her understand about all the changes that are happening in her life? Be an excellent father by finding a way to connect with a therapist or counselor. All that you have to do is to search for the best mental health expert in your community. Look for someone who has an excellent track record of helping troubled teens. “The situation is not hopeless. It just requires action.” reminds Susan Heitler Ph.D. However, you have to talk to your daughter about this first before taking the necessary steps.
Remind yourself that life goes on after this. Be courageous for your teen and everyone in the family.