It has been more than a month since the world received the most devastating news about the Coronavirus outbreak. I am one of the few individuals who ignored it. Honestly, I never thought it would end up to be this bad; that is why I never entirely thought about preparing at all. I was so confident that things will soon be okay and that experts will eventually find a way to control the situation. But I was wrong. Now, all that is left in my head are questions of these pandemic uncertainties. There are what-ifs that I want answers. I desire the end to all of this for the sake of the most important persons in my life.
Failure To Do My Duty
As a father, I was supposed to take care of my family. My wife and children depended on me. But with the current situation right now, I felt so vulnerable. I considered myself incompetent in providing my family their needs in times of crisis like this. I believe I failed to do my duty of becoming a better father because I did not take the situation seriously. I often told my wife that things are not that bad, so we don’t have to worry about anything. As positive it may sound, the result of that overly confident statement created a toll on our lives.
Now, we have nothing. Our family’s situation could have been better if only I listened to my wife’s advice. She told me that we need to save and prepare ourselves in case the Coronavirus infection gets worse. I shrugged her off and said to her that she is just overreacting. I was so stubborn and ignored her reminders that the possibility of an outbreak is at stake. Now, it is too late to regret everything.
Emotional And Mental Torment
But what entirely drew me to my mental illness is when I became a virus carrier. I was so stupid to think that my family is protected all the time. As I continued to ignore the possibility of the infection harming me, I never thought it could do so much damage to my whole family. I did not listen to anyone, and I was so relentless about following safety protocols. I thought it was merely annoying that such a government directive is keeping me from doing what I usually do. But my stubbornness made me experienced emotional and mental pain when my wife got infected.
I was shocked to know that I am a COVID-19 positive. Honestly, I thought about it when I experienced mild symptoms. But then, I was too confident that the disease won’t do any harm to my body. Little did I know that it will soon get passed on to my beloved wife. My anxiety heightened up when doctors figured out that she caught the infection from me. Yes, my wife experienced the Coronavirus’ symptoms and for almost 15 days, until she was unable to breathe properly. Eventually, after the 20th day, she died, and I wasn’t there during her times of suffering because I wasn’t allowed. But what added more damage to my already unstable mental and emotional state is when my two sons showed symptoms as well. That is why they are both were hospitalized and isolated from me.
Now I am all alone feeling guilty of everything that has happened to my family. If only I listened, things could have been different. My stupidity and ignorance was the reason I lost my wife. And now, I am on the edge of losing my sons as well.
Please do not allow this to happen to you. Think about your family.